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Mark's Christmas Crossword

Across
"Oh, this is your wife, huh? A lovely lady. Hey baby, you must've been something before ___"
McClane's alias
Jake and Elwood's orphanage, St. Helen of the Blessed ___
How the aliens come out at night, according to Newt
Where's safe? Where's familiar? Where can I smoke?
Made the red Swingline stapler famous
"Sorry you got killed by my dad"
Director of Thee Flavours Cornetto Trilogy
The people of Rock Ridge would do anything for him
He f*cked her with a parsnip last week and sold that parsnip to a family with four small children.
I was hiding under the porch because I love you.
Plays himself in Airplane!
Peck, Hathaway, and Thornburg
Strode, Ophelia, and Gershwitz
"Can you hammer a six inch ___ through a board with your penis?"
Response to Frau Blucher
His art is death. He's about to paint his masterpiece.
Eve's boyfriend
Captain Garland's dog
It creeps and leaps and glides and slides across the floor
Dog treats with that real liver and tuna taste with just a hint of cheese
"Yeah but I figure, what the hell, that's Jersey."
Down
"Don't get saucy with me, ___"
Gondorff does this better than Lonnegan
How many zombies are out there, Shaun?
"No, Mr. Bond, I expect you to ___"
Jesus, Kane, and Hadden
Ripley, Barrett, and DeMarco
The speed before plaid
"WHAT?! SNOW IN THE ___"
Emily Dickinson College sophomore that died in kiln explosion
"___ this motherf*cker out"
His half-sister's nephew married cousin Ellen before she got bit by that dog and died
"I am serious, and don't call me ___"
Paul Newman's last movie
What Ralphie eats after saying fudge
Jack O'Neill's buddy!
Has psychological problems caused from being rejected/abandoned by her mistress and suffering depression from being unloved