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The Cynical Scribe's Guide to NGS Markets in the US: April 2020 Edition

If you need extra clues, contact [email protected]
Across
We're #10. First Oxford threatened us, then Roche jilted us, then 10X overwhelmed us, then Illumina jilted us. Nice folks don't deserve so many bad breaks.
We're #17. Genome cartography seemed like a great idea when we went public, but our stock has sold for under a buck for the last six months.
We're #3. We still think Twist stole our IP, but we decided to settle in February.
We're #16. Our sequencing businesses are in decline, because we are focused on building our mass cytometry franchise.
We're #5 for the next few months. Then we'll be part of #2.
We're the #14 supplier of American NGS labs, but we're #8 in library-prep.
We're the new #4 and a lawsuit magnet. We settled with BD in October; now we're making Bio-Rad lawyers rich.
We're #7. Danaher bought us in 2018 to enhance their molecular offerings
We're #8 in the NGS neighborhood, but everywhere else we go we're #1.
We're #11. 10X should be thanking us; we lobbied the British antitrust authorities to say no to Illumina.
We're 454/Roche refugees; we emerged from stealth mode at PAG in January. There's a new long-read team.
Down
Our instrument revenues were down 3% in 2019; we've created a global glut of sequencers.
We're #12. Our old-tech NIPT franchise is shrinking because sequenced NIPT is growing; good thing we have a piece of the libraries market.
We're #6, and the leading supplier of liquid handling robotics.
You can fit our new sequencer in a rolling briefcase, and you can buy it for $10,000.
We launched our refrigerator-sized sequencer for small hospitals at AMP last year. But Covid-19 took away all the elective procedure money they rely on. Better rethink these sales quotas.
We're #13. Nugen won't be our last acquisition in the NGS space
We're #9, the ddPCR team, and also the main antagonist of 10X Genomics
We're fine-tuning more than a thousand desktop sequencers in China. Soon Illumina will feel our presence in the US.
We're #15. Our main business is synthetic DNA, but NGS labs like our libraries too.